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Silly Superstitions

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As once said by the great Stevie Wonder, “When you believe in things that you don’t understand, you suffer.” However, the south is home to countless superstitions, while most, and more likely all, are absolute hogwash, they are part of our culture. These wives tales have been passed through generations, though most hopefully don’t rely on them too greatly, here are ten great ones for predicting weather, death, bad luck, and more.

Bachelors take heed! Is your love life looking bleak? Well maybe the house keep is to blame. Jumping the broom has always been a lucky marriage tradition, but the broom also can cause a long life of loneliness. If someone sweeps over your feet you’re bound never to marry. While this may not truly prevent you from wedding, it’s at least a valid excuse.

Sty in your eye? This is a particularly gruesome looking boil that develops in your eye, typically paired with pus and pain. Don’t waste your time with a doctor, our Appalachian ancestors figured out an easy, quick-fix solution. To cure said sty, simply stand in the middle of crossroads and quote, “Sty, sty leave my eye. Take the next one coming by.” (I do not actually suggest taking this method of sty removal; if this ails you, I advise seeing a physician.)

Save the heartache, whistling before breakfast will, in effect, cause you to cry before dusk, so keep your tunes to yourself. Likewise, talking about your dreams before breakfast, chiefly nightmares, will cause them to come true. For those preparing the cuisine, dropping a biscuit indicates you will have unwelcome company coming your way. Breakfast seems to be a very dangerous time in the superstitious world and I advise you to go about the meal carefully.

You cannot be with child and couture at the same time. Women who are expecting are advised to retire their stilettos. Pregnant women who wear heels are likely to give birth to a cross eyed child. The only conclusion I could possibly come to was that highheels were not common when this myth was fabricated, but either way, it’s exceedingly farfetched.

Plan your beauty appointments accordingly to save yourself from misfortune. It’s very bad luck to cut your nails on Fridays and Sundays. You might want to reschedule those weekend mani-pedis and play it safe.

Your farm land was your pride back in the old days of the Appalachian mountains. An especially dry season could wipe out everything you had, so extra measures were taken. In order to make it rain, you’ll need to find yourself a snake. After killing the serpent bury it ‘belly-up’ in your field. This is an additionally gruesome, but more effective, way to bring on the thunder rather than rain dancing.

Here’s another medical DIY for those troubled with warts. If you’re looking for a painless and easy cure, simply steal someone’s dishrags. Bury the pilfered cloth and wait a few days, you’ll find your warts, like magic, have disappeared.

Last, but most certainly not least, my favorite legend yet. Put a hold on summer fun, while watermelons are in season, they come with a grave price. Swallowing the seed of the fruit will result in the plant sprouting in your innards, you will have a growing watermelon in your stomach. This myth does not include any other fruits or vegetables, just watermelon, and the cure is unfortunately unknown.

These provided superstitions hardly scrape the surface of the infinite mass of tall tales told in the Appalachian mountains. While many are silly, weird, and even cringe-worthy they are just another colorful addition to Tennessee’s heritage. So embrace your achy-weather-predicting knees and pass the story on.

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Silly Superstitions